Much of my life and career centered around trying to be “good enough,” and that led to a lot of performance on my part. It began when I was quite young and I wanted to please my father. He was quite distant and pretty much devoted to his job. So, my mission was to try and be the best at what I thought he might appreciate. To say the least, it never seemed to work out the way I hoped it would.
Fast forward to my own family and my relationship with my own children. Like my father, I too was over the top devoted to work, career, success, and everything that came with it…the accolades from my peers, the awards from my employer, the recognition of my industry…and yes, the money it provided. But it was all pretty empty when I look back on all the opportunities I missed during those days to be a better husband, father, friend…and, well, a better man.
Fortunately, God saved me by His grace…no credit on my part. It was His gift…and all my efforts to perform meant nothing to Him. He gave me a new life, a new perspective, and a new identity that isn’t rooted in any achievements or accolades. My identity has absolutely nothing to do with my performance…it’s about what He’s done for me and the rich inheritance He has for me.
I still struggle at times, as I think most of us do…performance flesh is a hard thing to shake loose of…but if I know my identity rests in Him, I realize where that ego-driven performance comes from, and I can trust Him to help me see my value from His eyes. Praise God!